Posts

Endo 1 - Amy 0

Image
Its been a while since I've been online. In all honesty I've been struggling with giving Endometriosis more of my time then it deserves. When I started this blog it motivated me and I genuinely felt like it was helping me. But recently, its been the last thing I've wanted to do. Why do I want to talk about something that has already taken so much from me. Why would I want to talk about something I have nothing positive to say about. Why would I spend my time writing about something that has consumed so much of my time already...Well, I guess I probably write about it for all three of the reasons that I've just written. So here I am, writing, again.

Its been a few months since I had a real bad flare up. 6 months in fact. I've been fortunate to be able to deal with the general day to day pain. Even when it creeps up on me and hits me a little harder, I've been able to cope. Managing it with over the counter pain medication and choosing to be stubborn and work th…

Support Group Reminder

Image
Hi All,

Just a reminder that tomorrow hosts our next North Essex Endometriosis UK support group. Come along 10.00 - 12.00 at Myland Parish Church Hall, Colchester. Absolutely everyone is welcome, so please come along for a cuppa and a biccie.

Hope to see some of you there!

A x



She's back!

Image
Its been a while. I said I was going to take a couple of weeks off and its turned into almost a month away. It was needed. I was feeling really low. Writing about how I felt has helped me enormously in the past, not only with getting things off my mind but with accepting the cards I had been dealt. But it was actually starting to make things worse for me. I needed to stop letting this disease completely consume me.

There is a lot of negativity that comes with living with something you know will never been cured. Not long ago we lost a member of the Endo community. The pain and the lack of help made her feel like there was no other way out. I know what it is like to have dark days, but I hope to never ever feel like there is nothing but complete darkness like she did. And that is part of the reason I write this blog. To help me but to also help others know they aren't alone.

So here I am! Back sitting here, writing to you all. Its been a good couple of weeks. A week away on holida…

Taking a break

Image
Firstly I want to apologise for my lack of blogging recently. I feel like my life is being consumed by this frigging disease. Daily I contend with not feeling myself and dealing with the pain. When I see people they ask how I am and want to know updates (which I appreciate!). And even simple conversations at work about pregnancy can turn my day upside down. So to come home and write about it as well, just seems to be extra hard work.
I go away in a week and a half so I won't be blogging then either, but I'm going to take a break from now for a while. I'm going to take some time for myself. I know there are things that I want to investigate, such as adoption, but I also want some time to not think either. I want to try and give myself some time away from thinking about this dreaded disease and I hope my body will allow me to do that too.
Don't worry, I will be back and I'd like to thank everyone who continues to follow my journey and read my blog.
Rest up. Take care…

Thank you

Image
I wanted to write a quick blog to thank all those people who have supported me and continue to do so through my good and bad days. I've struggled over the last couple of weeks with not only pain, but with feeling pretty low with it too. Everyone tells you to keep positive but when you're stuck in that rut, you don't know how. I've always said friends and family are what get me through my worst days and I still 100% stand by that. Without you all, I don't know what I would do.

From the bottom of my heart, I thank you.

A x

Never ending pain

I've had some lovely messages of support since my last blog on Tuesday from friends and family. I really do appreciate all your words and although I am struggling, it does help.

Unfortunately, I had to leave work at lunchtime today due to my pain. I had taken painkillers and had a hot water bottle, but whilst I was talking to a colleague at my desk, all of a sudden it felt like my heart was doing somersaults, I felt faint and I was feeling nauseous. I have no idea what it was but my heart was pounding in my chest and I was struggling not to be sick. It was horrid.

I hate what this disease is doing to me. Not only that but I'm embarrassed. I don't want people to see me when I'm struggling, especially at work. Some might say I'm too proud, or simply just too stubborn but thats just how I am. I've had the chance of having a natural family taken away from me, so I find it extremely frustrated that its now effecting the one thing I've thrown myself into. My work…

Hospital Appointment

Image
I've had an odd day. First thing I headed into London, suited and booted, ready for an interview for an exciting opportunity at work. I was nervous but excited. I was anxious but determined. And although they didn't give anything away, I was pleased with my presentation. I felt good. The pressure had been lifted and I had done everything I could to give myself the best possible chance. I made my way back to Colchester feeling pretty happy with myself.

And then I got a voicemail from the hospital....

As you know I've been waiting for my operation date. I was put in for the op on 5th December 2016. The NHS waiting times state patients should be treated within 18 weeks of referral for the procedure. Keep that in mind when I tell you the next part. The voicemail was advising I finally had a operation date. My first thought "YES!! Finally! Pain free days are coming!". The next part of the voicemail was "you're booked in for 30th November 2017". My next t…